Is Difficulty and Stress Making You Bitter...or Better?

I’ve never met a person who doesn’t face problems or experience some degree of stress. If you don’t have problems or stress, this article probably won’t be much help to you!

But if you are dealing with problems and stress right now, here is a question worth considering: Are those challenges making you bitter, or are they helping you become better?

We’ve all seen it happen—and perhaps experienced it ourselves. Something happens in our lives, and it begins to affect us in destructive ways. We may become angry, and that anger can turn into depression and bitterness. Over time, the emotional weight of the situation grows heavier, and we may sink into deep despair.

Here’s another question: Is there a way to respond to problems and difficulties that leads us to a better place rather than a bitter one? I absolutely believe there is.

Based on my coaching, observations, and personal experience, here are a few responses that can help turn difficulty and stress into growth.

1. Accept that you are not in full control of your circumstances. Wanting things to be different does not change them. Also accept that you cannot change other people. You may influence them, help them, or even hinder them, but in the end, they choose who they want to be and what they want to do.

2. Talk with someone you trust who can help you clarify the facts of the situation. Seek to understand the big picture, and begin identifying what you can do that is good and helpful. Reach out for appropriate support, and try not to isolate yourself.

3. Consider what you can learn and how you can grow through the changes. Difficulty and tragedy often create a context for substantial change. While there may be much you cannot control, you still have the ability to choose your response.

It comes down to this question: Will you choose to own your circumstances, choose your response, and refuse to become a helpless, defeated victim?

You can become better—and reject bitterness.